Feeling pressured to choose a career? Calm down, already
When you're 5, deciding the future is a million times easier. You're in a sandbox, digging a hole or whatever, and you see an airplane flying above you. You think, "Hey, that's cool," and it's settled. Pilot for life.
That's because, at the age of 5, everything can be defined two different ways: Happy or sad.
Flying planes? Happy.
Waiting with Dad down at the DMV? Sad.
As the years go by, that future gets a lot more complicated. Happy and Sad turn into Good Choice and Bad Choice.
It's about this time that most people stop thinking, "Oh, that's cute," about whatever childhood dreams you may have. They're waiting to judge you, waiting to see if you want to do something profitable rather than something you may actually enjoy doing.
It's a common misconception among teens that something terrible is going to happen to them if they don't figure out what they want to be when they grow up. The people surrounding them often bring upon this guilt, even if it's by parents who are innocently trying to steer their kids in the right direction.
Rarely does any adult try to maliciously scare a teen-ager into getting his or her act together. A young person's stressful decisions about life are normally weighed down by people who are just trying to help.
However, it can be hard for that young person to decipher help from force.
It begins to feel like force when high school graduation nears. By then, many students have it all figured out, but there are others who are unsure.
Most high schools do a good job of delivering all of the basic knowledge needed to get to the next level. But high school lacks certain elements that colleges offer. At college, people gain a sense of freedom and perspective that they just don't have during high school. Between all of the classes, lunches and pep rallies, choosing a career isn't always right there in plain sight.
Normally, I tend to think that the "I wish I had a dollar." phrase is overused. But if it could be true for just one instance, I'd use it for the number of times I've been asked what I'm going to college for. Honestly, I could really use the extra spending money.
I wasn't sure about the rest of my life coming right out of high school, but that didn't mean that I was lazy about my decisions. It made more sense to wait it out and identify with what I like doing rather than choosing to do something that's going to make somebody else happy. Once I opened my eyes to the possibility that writing could actually be a career option, and not just a hobby, I began to feel at ease with my life as it appeared to be set on the right track.
For all of those graduating high schoolers this year, prepare to hear, "What are you going to college for?" about 67 times a day for the whole summer. And it will come from family members, friends, teachers and strangers you meet who can't think of anything wittier to say to you.
When you get some downtime between all of those graduation parties, it might be wise to sit and think about what they're asking. But if you don't figure it out right then, it shouldn't be the end of the world. If it's two or three years later and that big Master Plan still isn't figured out yet, it's still not the end of the world. Life is going to go on even if you don't feel you can keep up with it.
Being rushed into planning out the next 50 years isn't exactly easy, nor is it a comfortable position. For many young people, this is a decision that is often made out of pressure, and not of choice. Whether the pressure comes from hopeful parents or your own aspirations, it's always going to feel like an intimidating influence.
The trick is to keep it at bay for as long as you have to before realizing what the right thing for you is.